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To not go meant total social censure and possibly being disowned by one’s family. It would also mean not having any girl to date or marry you since they were all groomed from the cradle to only marry returned missionaries.This would have been bad enough even if I still believed in the church but deep down, I didn’t anymore. Even before I left I had questioned many things. There was just too much that was illogical, contradictory, clashed with well -established historic and scientific facts, or was frankly stupid. Yet, despite this, here I was spending the prime of my youth trying to get people to swallow this crap.After a long and particularly horrible day of having countless doors slammed in my face I simply lost it. That evening back at our apartment I just spilled it and told my companion how I actually felt, knowing the consequences could be dire. He was the best companion I’d had to this point which did make it easier to talk with him. To my enormous relief, not to mention. When everyone sat me at the table to finally eat my lunch, Diana actually pulled out a notepad and a tape recorder from her backpack to record my 'observations' (where did that ever come from, we were each naked previously?).However, she didn't so much interview me as she simply asked me my opinion on a series of things, not political or religious opinions either, but about my basic beliefs, what did I think of creativity, about love and achievement. I knew she was thinking with her philosophy major in mind, so I kept my responses along those lines. It seemed she was serious about wanting to help me craft some kind of a philosophy. So the time I didn't spend in bed, we spend sitting in the living room discussing philosophical concerns. Molly had plenty of advice as well, although she told me I didn't need much meditation since I seemed to be pretty 'mindful' as it was. I wasn't sure what the hell that meant, but I took it to be a good thing.The discussion was actually fun, and I.
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